advertising

i have a problem with a great many advertisements for a great many reasons, so I'm going to tackle a few of them and explain myself in a few posts here.

i will begin with wheat thins current line of advertising in which a van full of wheat thin employees check twitter for wheat thin related posts and then jump out at the posters of said tweets with boxes of wheat thins. i have a problem in general with this fake guerrilla format, and wheat thins are not the only ones, )see domino's pizza forcing people who gave bad reviews to their pizza to give it another chance) but the wheat thins are offensive to me in a way the pizza isn't.
my big problem isn't really even how ridiculous the idea of some woman bothering to tweet that her life is over because she is out of wheat thins; my problem is their ludicrous reaction. they deliver her enough wheat thins that they need a fork lift to put them in her driveway and then speed off.
why would anyone want that. if i was that lady i would be pissed. its just.. offensive.







another of their spots involves a guy who supposedly tweeted that he wishes there were crunch proof headphones so he doesn't have to turn up the volume when he eats wheat thins. so they show up with what they claim to have invented in their labs, a pair of crunch proof earphones. they put them on the poor guys head interrupting his meal out on the patio of some cafe, and crunch at him through a megaphone.
what. the. fuck.
anyone who has ever eaten something crunchy while watching TV or even in some cases listening to their headphones knows that that man is not referring to crunching from others, and if you don't have experience with this then at least you can read his supposed tweet and know what he means! god damn! and sound canceling headphones already exist! wheat thins, you know you didn't invent those in your cracker lab!

i don't know why this drives me so crazy, but it does. i like wheat thins, but no more, i cant look at them without thinking of that lame van and that smug fuck in charge of where they go.

fuck you wheat thins. fuck you.



up next, my thoughts on dorito's late night cheeseburger.